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Making Plans for How We Want to Be Remembered

It may sound morbid, but an uneventful death is one of the most thoughtful things you can give your children. As sad as it is to cope with the death of a loved one, the situation can be worsened by poor communication and disorganized planning.

For example, have you considered what you would like regarding a funeral? Do you have a favorite Psalm you’d like read or hymn sung? Do you want to be buried or cremated? Will your organs be donated? Yes, these can be very troubling and painful questions to address — but imagine having to consider them after you just lost that loved one. This is what it will be like for your spouse or children if you don’t address funeral planning issues while you’re alive.

Awash with grief, family members may not be able to recall details about your history — early jobs, places lived, volunteer activities, even some of the things you may be most proud of in your life — to include in your eulogy or obituary. If your children are not familiar with people in your everyday life, they may not even know to contact certain friends to let them know you’ve passed.

Consider writing out some of these things to help your loved ones plan a beautiful and loving tribute after your death. This way, they won’t have the regret of remembering your favorite hymn months after the funeral. Give your children access to your address book, email and cell phone contacts, and any other social media accounts so they can let people know. Don’t forget to include former colleagues they may have never met but that you know would like to pay their respects at your funeral.

And of course, have a will and/or or trust in place to make sure your wishes for your estate are followed. We can refer you to a qualified estate planning attorney who can assist you with this.

Why think about death now? Because it’s inevitable, and detailing how you would like to be remembered is one of the most considerate gifts you can provide your children during one of most difficult times in their life.

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Danielle Christensen


Danielle is dedicated to serving clients to achieve their retirement goals. As a Paraplanner, Danielle helps the advisors with the administrative side of preparing and documenting meetings. She is a graduate of the College of St. Benedict, with a degree in Business Administration and began working with Secured Retirement in May of 2023.

Danielle is a lifelong Minnesotan and currently resides in Farmington with her boyfriend and their senior rescue pittie/American Bulldog mix, Tukka.  In her free time, Danielle enjoys attending concerts and traveling. She is also an avid fan of the Minnesota Wild and loves to be at as many games as possible during the season!